Lying on the sofa on Saturday, a blustery day, watching the trees being pushed hard by the wind. I called a friend and said, "I'm not going out to the supermarket, it's too much of a gale out there."
"Oh, you can afford to go the supermarket?" he said.
"Only to the bins where they throw food out."
"Isn't there a whole crowd there already? How do you get at them?"
"There's usually some small waif child you can knock over and then nick their stuff."
"It's dog eat dog out there."
"Dogs! When did you last see a dog? They’ve all been stir fried."
He then told me a story about a charity that he's a member of. One of the office bearers realised that they had £100,000 in the Bank of Scotland. Because deposits only up to the value of £35,000 are protected by the Government, he thought he should withdraw the difference. He didn't want a cheque, in case it bounced. When he got the cash out, it was too late to find somewhere to deposit it. He then walked about with £65,000 in cash on his person. So, muggers should now target workers for the voluntary sector – usually a shabby lot with Save XX or Support YY on their faded t-shirts, and not worth the robbing.
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